Update: Thursday July 3, 2008 - Smug City

 

Part of the Nouveau Riche?

At the Battersby’s  Cilla is going on about being a millionaire and all the dosh she is going to receive. The outfit she has on reminds me of Big Bird and Barney in mouring. Kirk tells her she should keep it on the down low, but she thinks otherwise.

Cilla goes into the cabin and picks up a magazine and declares to Norris about her new found wealth and that Chesney will no longer need his job as a delivery boy. Oh dear.

She then prances into StreetCars and pulls out a fifty pound note and demands a ride to the solicitor’s office.

Cilla and Lloyd arrive at the office in the taxi and tells Lloyd to open the door for her.  God, what a nightmare in the making.  She tells him that she could “get used to this”.  Once in the office she wants to know how long she has to wait to see the solicitor.  And brags that she has a car waiting.  LOL.

Little Black Book

In the café, Becky is flirting with Jason, Sarah comes up and tells her she better keep her hands to herself.  Sarah then asks Jason for his address book so she can send out more invitations.  She tells him that people have cancelled.

Sarah arrives back at the Salon. David says he’ll get out of her way and go to Roy’s Rolls.  He keeps making comments about Sarah and Jason’s wedding not going ahead. David tells her that she’ll be “wasting her stamps. But then again” he goes on “every show needs an audience doesn’t it?”

Sarah leaves the salon and David looks through Jason’s address book that Sarah has left there. He has the smile of a Cheshire Cat.

Spoiled Kebabs

Jerry and Eileen arrive back on the street in a cab after Eileen’s birthday trip. He seems is furious to see that the kebab shop is closed and immediately blames Jodie.

Jodie completely ignores Jerry when he arrives back home. He confronts her. She is still very annoyed about being left to clear up after Finnigan’s birthday party – who can blame her?

Lloyd goes to see Jerry in the kebab shop Jerry apologizes about Lloyd and Jodie’s ruined date. He offers Lloyd money to take Jodie out another time. He doesn’t take the money.  Good move.

Lloyd later sees Jodie. He tells her about Jerry’s offer of money which she is furious about.

Jodie catches up with her dad and is still angry that he tried to offer money to Lloyd. She lets him know how humiliated she feels by his actions. Jerry tries to calm Jodie down without any success.  She tells him to keep out of her life.

Scottish Hottie

In the factory office Liam is acting smug. He then notices there aren’t any roses decorating the office and assumes this means that Carla and Scottish Tony are splitsville. He also thinks this means they have lost Tony as a client. She informs him otherwise and tells him how great things are between them. I love it.

At Underworld, Carla is having problem sending e-mail with an attachment. Liam sighs and says “Ahh women and technology” Which is infuriating!! Tony arrives looking sauve to take Carla out to luch. Liam then goes on to claim that Carla is not the one in control of her and Tony’s relationship like she earlier stated. 

 

Music at Underworld

Cardigans and Manic Street Preachers – Your Love is Not Enough

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jyrJJxGWQ5g

 

Update for Wednesday, July 2, 2008. David’s New Project

Rich Bride, Poor Bride

At the Platts’, Sarah-Lou and Jason have returned from their walk and tell Gail that they have come to an important decision regarding their wedding: they want a chocolate fountain. And by “they”, we, of course, mean Sarah. Jason just needs to know when to show up.

Gail congratulates them for making one decision in the 1001 other things they’ll need to decide before giving their money over to the Bridal/Industrial Complex.

Gail decides they should discuss the wedding in full with all family members in attendance, including Eileen, but not David.

Gail calls Audrey to invite her over but David overhears and asks if they were talking about him. Audrey makes like he’s being an egoïste.

Anyway, Bill thinks being excluded from the wedding isn’t such a bad thing.

Of course, later, as David is talking to Darryl outside the Platts, he sees Audrey and Bill pull up and head toward the house with a bottle of wine in tow.

As they discuss the chocolate fountain, the church, the chocolate fountain, the flowers, and the chocolate fountain, David stands in the window and stares through the net curtains. This may have been the first time a character stared through net curtains into a house.

Eventually, everyone is creeped out and Gail goes outside to talk to David. He claims they are talking about him but she brings him inside to show they are talking about the wedding. He seems offended that he’s not even considered part of the family anymore but Sarah is surprised he’d even want to be a part of the wedding.

He again apologises for what he did to Bethany but Sarah says maybe in a thousand years, she’d forgive him. He asks if he can help at the wedding or the stag do, but it’s made clear he’s not invited to either.

David then says there is no way, therefore, that this wedding will ever happen.

The Only Socially Acceptable Place An Adult Should Dress as a Pirate is at a Child’s Birthday Party

Corrie Canuck: For All Your Eurovision Needs

It’s Finlay’s pirate-themed birthday party and there are 800 children in the house, not much sign of Finlay, but a whole lot of Jerry.

He and Jodie engage in a little pirate skit in which he tells bad pirate jokes. Oooh, I got one!

Q: Why didn’t the little kids see ‘Sex in the City’?
A: Because it was rated “AAAARRRRRRRR!!!”

Anyway, he’s not staying long, as he has a hot date with his “partner” Eileen which involves dinner at Chesire’s finest Indian restaurant (his friend owns it and promises a 10% discount), and the rather presumptuous move of booking the hotel next door. The kids are therefore dumped on Jodie, who protests that she was meeting someone (she made a date with Lloyd at the Rovers).

Jerry asks who this is, despite having practically thrown her toward Lloyd the other day. She says nobody and Jerry figures it’s ok for her to break the date.

Later, she gets her friend to watch the kids while she quickly goes across the street to meet Lloyd. She’s apologetic at first but then goes into a long rant about how selfish her father is and how he takes her for granted. She then gives him a big kiss and agrees that they’ll meet again later, then returns to the party. Liz notes that she looks good in a skirt. Lloyd agrees.

Violet

At the Rover’s, Sean hasn’t turned up for his shift, leaving Violet to fill in. She gets a little queasy and starts feeling ill. Jamie takes her to the hospital, just to be sure, given what happened last time.

Later Sean walks in apologising for his lateness and tells Liz how he was transported to another world with Marcus and they talked all night and had an interlude in which they did their own version of the Haagen-Dasz commercial.

This one?

Liz tells him that Violet was taken to th’hospickle with Jamie and Sean flies out the door. Turns out Vi had some bad spaghetti but all is well.

Except that I think Violet will be leaning on Jamie on a little more in the future for these types of things.

In Other News

Claire let Ashley sleep on the couch.

Tony Gordon’s been sending lots and lots of flowers to Carla. She suggests it may be a little over the top.

Original broadcast date: Friday, October 5, 2007.

 

In Which Bill Auditions For The Zimmers - Update

The episode starts with Bill singing a very geriatric cover of ‘My Generation’ and for a second I thought I was watching a reverse mortgage commercial.

Maybe it’s because I was still picking white and pink icing out of my hair from the Canada Day festivities, but I got to say, it’d didn’t feel like a lot happened Tuesday either.

The Only Slightly Interesting Thing That Happened

Sarah still hates David and cheers the fact that Jason threw him up against the wall. Audrey talks to Gale about needing to reconcile with David and when he brings Gale flowers, she suggests that they go out for dinner.

Over dinner Gale tells David how she knows he upset that he found out that she wanted to abort him, but that ever since the minute he was born she has loved him. This is a good thing and it seems to ease David’s worries about his mom’s love for him.

Unfortunately he was assuming that the whole dinner was arranged to talk about him moving back home. When Gale tells him that the dinner is just to open up the lines of communication and to help them understand each other more, he stomps off claiming that she is playing head games with him.

Dead Frank

Dead Frank’s solicitors called around the house for Cilla, but as only Kir-keh was home, he called Fizz worried that the solicitors are there to get the necklace back.

Fizz calls Cilla and tells her to return the necklace, but Cilla tells them that it was a gift and not having a guilty conscience, she calls Dead Frank’s solictors.

On a personal note, I’m kind of bummed by this. As much as Cilla is a horrible person, I kind of wanted her to be Dead Franks fancy lady.

What Else Happened?

Maria is teased by Sarah about Liam.

Carla and Tony have a bit of ‘boom boom let’s go back to my room’ and we find out later that Carla hasn’t wang-chunged in QUITE a while. Hmmm…does this mean the marital bed was a bit cold before Paul threw off his mortal coil?

Jody out right asks Llyod if he likes her. He says, ‘Yessssssssssss’ and they arrange for a date at the Rovers.

Oh and Sean’s Marcus pops into the bar to tell everyone that smoking and drinking while your pregnant is just a bad thing to do. (Glacia was a bit of WTF? What’s with the public service announcements in the middle of my wee half hour of sex and Violets?)

 

Monday June 30th 2008 – The Nothing Really Happened Update

UK Time Monday October 3rd 3007

I write this update on Canada Day just before I head to my friends place for some sumptuous Korean Barbeque to be followed by a rousing outdoor party on the beach beside the interesting Lake Ontario.  Happy Canada Day Corrie Canucksters! At some point I expect you all to raise a pint of Russell Honey Blonde, Grasshopper, Bohemianm, River City, Cameron’s, McAuslin, Pump House, Charelvoix, Freshwater, or Chilkoot depending on your location and say “Happy Birthday/Bonne Fete Canada!” Then dive into that curry and roti, borscht, tortiere, pasta, salted cod, chow mein, cheeseburger, tofu dog, or whatever it is that’s on your plate. Just have a good time.

On to the update. I think I could sum up this episode with the following:

Carla and Liam talks about stuff
Steve and Lloyd talked about stuff
Michelle and Carla talked about stuff
Maria and Liam talked about stuff
The factory girls talked about stuff.
Sean and Violet talk about stuff.
Eileen and Jerry talked about stuff.
Sarah wont talk to David about stuff.
Vicky cracked some jokes. She’s golden.
Blanche is rude to Steve and Lloyd.

Seriously, that was it.

Basically this episode was a delivery system. For the following:

The old dude Cilla was caring for asked her to move in and told her that he would set her up big style if she would move in (and leave her son). Also, and this is key, after he des she would get basically everything. Then he up and dies a la Alf Roberts, in a chair and not noticed until it’s too late. What will Cilla do now?

Jason grabbed David and slammed him up against the fence.

Despite his best attempts Liam and Maria end up having drinks with Carla and Tony (not really caring about the Liam and Carla thing at all).

Honestly, that was it.

 

Update For Episode #6655 June 27,2008

The Factory

Liam and Carla carry on with their snog in the office. They both come to their senses and cease and desist, and quickly try to blame each other for what happened. Liam decides to take a wander and goes round the pub to talk to his sister about Carla and Tony and all the that is going on at the factory. Michelle does the best she can to proffer advice based on the limited information she has. A short while later Carla comes by The Rovers looking for Liam but ends up having a similar chat with Michelle. They agree that men in general are trouble and wonder why they can’t be more straightforward. Carla does her best to ascertain if Liam let anything slip to Michelle about their kiss.

A while later Rosie and her fingernails pops round Liam’s to see if he is alright, but he gives her the brush off and closes the door in her face, but opens it after her to ask if Carla is still in the factory. Rosie tells him that she has gone home already.

Liam makes his way over to have a chat with Carla, but she is barely willing to let him into her building. (worried about her unspoken desire for Liam is my guess) They talk things through that the last thing on earth that either of them would want is to have a relationship with each other. The very thought of it would make Carla vomit. When Liam leaves though, Carla almost says something to him but stops herself at the last moment.

The last we see of Liam is him sitting in the back garden, bouncing a baseball off a wall to himself. (who plays baseball in th UK?) This scene is taken directly from the 1963 classic The Great Escape with Steve McQueen playing catch off a wall in the cooler to pass the time. I can only surmise that the writers are making an allegorical reference to Liam being a prisoner of his unspoken desire for his sister-in-law, in the same way that Virgil Hilts was a prisoner of the Germans in Luft Stalag III in the movie.

The factory girls ponder the future ownership of their workplace.

The Cab Office

Ashley comes by the cab office to talk to Claire and wonder why she didn’t ask him to babysit the kids. She points out that he has a business to run, and if he is constantly closing up shop they will have no money to keep the kids in food and clothing, which would be a bad thing.

The Cafe

The B team, aka Becky and Blanche, continue to keep the cafe running while Roy and Hayley are away communing with nature. After they knock off for the day the two of them stop in at The Rovers for a drink. Blanche orders her usual large gin and tonic, pointing out to Becky that at her age, it’s not a bad thing. Blanche wonders if Becky is going to do anything with her life, like have a family. Becky almost starts to tell the story of Hayley and Christian but stops herself, and ponders aloud if having a child is not a bit of a gamble.

The Salon

Sarah comes back to work for first time since the unpleasantness with Bethany. As expected, sparks soon fly between the two siblings and Sarah flounces out, saying she can’t work with David and wondering which one of them Audrey is going to have to sack. She goes by the builders yard to talk about what has happened with Jason. Audrey finds the two of them in the cafe and persuades Sarah to come back to work, but tells David that he has top leave for the rest of the day. Maria tells Audrey that David was actually on his best behaviour at work and Sarah might have been out of order, to which Audrey replies, ‘I’m a hairdresser, not a miracle worker.’

Audrey and Bill talk later, and Bill correctly points out how scheming David can be.

The Old Rectory

The tired old plot line of the missing money drags on. Frankly, I don’t give a damn.

Bits and Bobs

Not a single child actor was seen in any segment of this epiosde. Perhaps the producers realized what a shite bunch of child actors they had and are putting them through some sort of boot camp in an attempt to improve their thespian abilites.

No sign of Dev. Ken and Deirdre have been long absent as well.

 

Update: Thursday June 27, 2008 - “I promise to do my best”

The Duckworth Scandal

Jack and Vera are talking about the missing/returned money. Paul just comes in asking if Tyrone was saying it was him who took the cash. Jack says not in so many words. Paul asks if they think Tyrone took the money and trying to make out it was him. Vera is not so sure. Paul says they have the money back so they should forget about it. Jack agrees. Paul goes. Vera says he would agree as he always forgets.

Tyrone comes into the shop - and Molly asks if he is in a better mood. He says he hates being accused of stealing when he didn’t. Molly says Jack and Vera get mixed up. Tyrone says it is because Paul wants them to think that way. Cilla comes and starts listening to their conversation. Tyrone asks Molly if he believes her. She says yes and Tyrone starts again saying it must be Paul then. He leaves the shop frustrated when Molly tells him to stop going on about it. Cilla says he is not in the best of moods. Molly says she is not either.

Later outside the garage Tyrone runs up to Paul and says he knows he took the money. Paul admits it was him who took the cash. Tyrone asks if he is admitting it. Paul says yes - and tells him he took the money for the restaurant. Then says he didn’t speak up because he is sick of him trying to find out things about him. Paul then says he should think twice before telling Jack and Vera as it might just cause more trouble. Which when you think of it – sadly, is sort of true.

Tyrone needs to go to the Spy Shop and buy a web camera and wire.

He goes running into the shop and tells Molly what Paul just admitted. Tyrone thinks Molly does not believe him. Molly says she really does. Fizz comes in asking if this is the only cake. Molly says yes and then asks Tyrone what he is going to go. He does not know. Molly tells him to do nothing and they will talk later. Tyrone goes and Fizz says they will have to do.

Roy’s Rolls

Becky tells Blanche she is not expecting miracles and tells her to do what she can because she is old and decrepit. Wow, how nice. Blanche says she is going as does not want to be insulted. Becky says sorry. Blanche says she needs to sit down and wants cup of tea.

Lloyd asks where Roy is - Becky says he is away camping. Lloyd does not like the idea of creepy crawlies and cows (?) and asks Blanche if she camped. Blanche who is sitting down at a table says not since she was a Girl Guide. The visual kills me.

The wheels are turning in Becky’s head. She then tells Blanche she is closing the cafe. She yells and tells everyone there is an emergency and the café is now closed. Blanche asks why. Becky says she can’t say why and for her not to ask. She is on a mission. Fizz comes in asking for four tea cakes but is told the cafe is closed. She is out of luck.

Becky runs into Streetcars and wants a cab ASAP. Lloyd says yes and the charming driver too. Becky says she does not want chitchat and for him just to drive to Ashton Street.

Becky comes marching into the record shop – goes up to Christian and starts punching him. Whoa! Christian tells her to stop it and calls her mad. He holds her back and Becky asks to be let go. He finally lets her go and Becky says that hurt.

Becky says Hayley is the nicest person she has ever met. Christian says he didn’t hit a woman, he hit his “dad”. He asks if Hayley sent her to beat him up. Becky says she does not know she is here and says Hayley would have stopped her coming and would not want to hurt him even though he hurt her because she is a nice person. That was some scene!

Audrey’s Salon

David is really “trying” by being somewhat civil for once. He gets her tea, tries to talk to Sarah but she tells him she does not want to talk. Maria tells him to give her time and she will have to talk to him.

Maria she thinks the worst is over between Sarah and David. That is wishful thinking.

Underworld

The girls all ask Liam about Carla. He says she isn’t in. They say he really hates her and more then ever. Vikki says it’s always the same, one family member dies and the rest blame each other. Interesting concept.

Liam asks Rosie if Carla has phoned. She says no. Liam says he is not going to phone, as she will think they are checking up on her love life. Yeah, like you are not interested…

Outside Carla pulls up in her car and heads to the factory door. Liam says he thought he’d speak to her outside. She asks about what. He says her coming from Tony’s bed. How rude! Carla says she came from her own bed and was late because she wanted to give him some space – just like he goes on about.

Liam tells Rosie to go for a “wander” then tells Carla he should not have said what he just said. He says it’s not very smart going out with someone they are doing a big order for. Carla says she is not going out with him and thinks because he is Paul’s brother he has a “duty” look after her. She tells him she does not need looking after. We all know that…

Carla mentions because she is the widow of Paul he is trying to be faithful to his memory. He says he’s not and she does not have to throw herself at every man. Carla says Paul went off with prostitutes. Liam asks if she is getting her own back. Carla says she is trying to get her life back together. Liam pushes against the wall and kisses her.

OMG.

 

Update for Wednesday, June 25, 2008 - Hand Caught in Cookie Jar Update

Oh, Tyrone

It’s a lazy Sunday and Tyrone is doing a fry-up for the Duckworths, who insist he add an extra sausage for St. Paul, patron of grandchildren everywhere. Paul arrives with a copy of Lancashire Life for Vera and offers to take everyone out for pints in the Rovers later.

Jack insists on paying and goes to the Charles and Diana Memorial Cookie Tin to find a little cash. He finds £200 missing and asks Vera if she took. She denies (it was Paul, of course), as does everyone else. Paul assures them that he’s sure it’ll turn up.

Later, when they are preparing to leave, Paul reminds his grandparents that he’s still treating them at the pub. As they leave, Paul quickly returns the money he took to the Charles and Diana Memorial Cookie Tin.

Later in the Rovers, Tyrone and Molly talk about the missing money. Tyrone doesn’t think Jack is losing his faculties and is sure Paul took. Later he goes back to the Duckworths to search the tin himself, when, of course, Jack and Paul walk in on him. Jack finds the missing money in the tin and now everyone is convinced Tyrone is a crook.

That’s Not How You Report Your VAT

Liam is spending his lazy Sunday doing his VAT receipts (it’s like GST and we all love GST, don’t we?) at the office with the help of Rosie. And by help, Rosie means sitting on his desk and shoving her boobs in Liam’s face.

Liam is staying clear of this trouble and gets Rosie to go help while working at another desk. Later, he just sends her home, rebuffing her offers of overtime.

He later joins Maria for a pint. That’s when he finds out Tony Gordon had a drink with Carla and gave her a lift home (they had a chat – clearly, he’s interested. She’s standoff-ish.). Liam fumes about his brother not being dead four months but Maria points out that she can’t mourn forever.

ROY AND HAYLEY

Hayley suggests to Roy that they go away for a bit to talk things over. Roy thinks the trouble between them can’t be solved with a change of scenery. He also wonders if his episode yesterday was a nervous breakdown. He doesn’t think the trip is a good idea.

Hayley later suggests she go away by herself, if he won’t go with her. Roy suddenly remembers that the 30 right-of-return on his new tent is almost up so they should use it anyway, to test it out, BECAUSE ROY CROPPER HAS ASPERGER’S.

So plans are made for a little camping excursion (in October) and Becky is going to run the café with the only person Hayley could find at short notice: Blanche. Comedy hijinks are scheduled to ensue.

IN OTHER NEWS

Cilla is making her new fancyman/employer a breakfast in remembrance of their time in America, that traditional Yankee classic: pancakes and chicken wings. The hell? Anyhow, she didn’t have maple syrup so she put HP Sauce on it instead and she didn’t cook the chicken wings.

He complains and gives her some of his dead wife’s bling and tells her that there’s a lot more to come.

Oh, and there was some bit about Michelle and Steve trying to cook a fry-up together in privacy but were unable to. It was all quite pointless, really. But there it is. It happened.

 

I Want Locally Produced Eggs, Rick - Update

Around 7:15 last night I got a call from Debbie.

 

Debbie:  ‘Dude, who’s doing the update for tonight?’

 

Glacia: ‘Dude, me.  Why?’

 

Deborah: ‘Dude, there HAS to be a Falling Down refence.’

 

Glacia: ‘What like the movie?’

 

Deborah: ‘Totally.’

 

Glacia: ‘Duuuuuuuuuuuuuude. Sweeeeeeeeeeet.’

 

Deborah: ‘Duuuuude’.***

 

So not having seen the episode yet, I was worried.  Who had the breakdown, Roy, Tyrone or Bethany? 

 

***This is exactly how Debbie and I speak to each other.

 

In Which Roy Leaves His Padded Cell

Haley and Becky get off the bus, but Haley won’t go home to change.  When Becky tells Roy that Haley has gone straight to work and that he needs to go talk to her, he says he can’t that he needs to finish his work….then the mop and pail tip over and that is surely a bad sign.

 

Things get worse when Roy’s local supplier can’t bring milk or eggs until the next day.   Roy refuses to go to Dev’s to get eggs and milk because they’re not local produced.

 

Becky tells him that he has to go to Tescos – I mean FRESHCO, Freshsco.  Roy immediately starts going into a panic, ‘What’s an egg?  What do they look like?’.  Okay, it’s not that bad, but he does say that  Tes-er-Freshco is too big and that he might not be able to find the eggs and milk there. 

 

Oh dear.

 

Becky convinces him that he’ll be okay and gives him her mobile just in case she needs something else while he’s there.  Roy says that he doesn’t know how to operate a mobile, but Becky once again calms him and he is able to operate the floor all the way to the front of the café.  More success is found when he operates the door correctly, all the way muttering, ‘Milk and eggs, milk and eggs.’

 

Really, Becky should have gone instead, but Blanche says she doesn’t want to be left alone with Roy when he’s all ‘Rainman’ ‘n shit.

 

At Freshco’s Roy is sulking around the saran wrapped pile of milk in the middle of the aisle.   Michelle runs into him and tells him there’s milk in the fridge but he says the aisle milk is fresher.  (Now, I haven’t had a glass of milk in 25 years, but I seem to remember that milk needs to be kept cold….).   Michelle inquires about Haley, but Roy is more concerned about the excess packaging of the aisle milk.

 

Next we see him rummaging through the eggs looking for free range local eggs, and when a clerk coms to help Roy tells him he wants local eggs, preferably within walking distance.  So basically Roy wants eggs that were produced by Deidre.  While the clerk tries to help him, his mobile phone goes off and he needs the clerk to help him answer it.

 

Haley is calling him to remind him to come back.  Blanche tells her that he might not make it back.   The café is his padded cell and he leaves it at his own peril.

 

Back at Freshco’s things go from bad to worse.  Roy starts explaining that if the eggs were fresh, you wouldn’t need packaging (What?  Don’t local eggs break?)  Anyway, he decides to just carry the eggs in his coat pocket, thus removing the need for wasteful cardboard packaging.   The clerk says he can’t let him do that and when he tries to take the egg carton away from Roy, they  fall on the floor and break. 

 

Roy proclaims that it’s all right and instructs the clerk to get him a bag (Paper!  Not plastic!) while he proceeds to empty out further cartons into his grocery cart of milk.  This is where security steps in. 

 

(Okay, call me a big ol’ canuck, but I have NEVER seen security in a grocery store.  Oh, maybe once at the Tescos – I mean Dominion – in the Annex, but then again, you can’t trust a student population.)

 

Anyway, Becky was called and she collects Haley from the factory and who rushes over to Freshcos.  Meanwhile, unlike Falling Down, this breakdown ends in Roy having a nice cup of Tetley’s in the manager’s office who explains that Freshco’s has made a commitment to less packaging and he can read about it in their mission statement.  (You know, I realize now that when I die, I’d like it to happen during a sales pitch so that the transition will be painless.)

 

Actually, the manager was pretty sweet and when Haley arrives, he explains that Roy got ‘into a state’ but there’s no lasting damage.

 

Back at home, Roy asks Haley why she came to collect him and she says that she’s not sure.  (eek!).  When he asks if she will see Christian again, she says no, that he’s lived without her this long so she doubts he needs her.   Roy says that if he got to know her, he’d need her.  (awww.)   Anyway, they talk further about Christian and their own relationship and both express concern if they can ever be happy again.

 

I would like to add that I sympathize with Roy regarding the Frescho’s fiasco, having had my own recent difficulties with organic locally grown food.

 

Update, Chapter 2, In Which Glacia Really Doesn’t Care About Other Storylines 

Sarah declares that David doesn’t exist anymore, but Gayle reminds her that he’s her brother and the Salon is Audrey’s livelihood so they’re going to have to play nice in front of the customers.  Gayle, Audrey and Sarah go to the Rovers to talk about David.  Nothing new there, Gayle thinks he needs to learn a lesson, Audrey says he’s behaving and Sarah wants to talk about her Big Fat Mancunian Wedding (Part Deux).

 

Paul is being all sneaky and Tyrone continues to be suspicious.  He looks through Paul’s manbag but doesn’t find anything and when Paul sees that it’s been riffled through, he confronts Tyrone.   Tyrone basically tells him to jump in a lake and storms off.   Leeanne then calls him to tell him she needs supplies and he takes £200 from Jack’s cigar box to pay for it.

 

Liam is taking advantage of Rosie’s schoolgirl crush to get her to work overtime and make lunch runs.   Carla, rightly so, warns him about this and reminds him of the Joanne incident.

 

 

 

 

Update June 23rd 2008 – Airtime Contract Fulfillment Episode

UK Time Wednesday September 26^th 2007

 

Tonight’s episode was one of those round up shows where they seem to have to fulfill some airtime for certain actors, namely, Lloyd, Vernon, Kelly, Molly, Paul, Jodi, Wilf and Blanche.

 

 

The show opens with Lloyd playing with the ketchup and mustard containers in the café while he waits for his grub. Roy has totally immersed himself in the tiny details of the café all to avoid the huge problem in his marriage. It’s pretty clear that Roy is out of his depth in this labyrinth of raw human emotion and would rather be among the baked beans.

 

Meanwhile our Becky is all about meeting these challenges head-on. Ignoring Roy’s pleas Becky runs up to the flat to check on Hailey. She sees that Hailey has been hit and becomes very angry. However, her reaction is much better than Roy’s insistence on calling the police. Here we learn what Roy has totally missed. Hailey feels that she has something missing in her life. That is why Christian was so important to her and that is why she needed to be extra careful not to loose him. Why can’t Roy get that?

 

Down in the café Roy is now dealing with Blanche and Wilf. The gruesome twosome have complaints about the portion sizes and Roy is sticking to his guns telling them that local produce is more expensive and it is either higher prices or smaller portions.  Blanche wouldn’t like either. The man has got conflict coming at him from all sides.

 

Becky comes down into the café and tells Roy that he needs to go patch things up with the missus. She also, quite rightly, tells Roy where he’s going wrong in the café and in his marriage. He insists on shoving his values down everyone else’s throat. Good point, Becky.

 

Becky gets Roy up the stairs and deals with Blanche and Wilf. She is quickly becoming one of my favourites.

 

Upstairs Roy does a bang up job of further alienating Hailey, who, in all fairness, has gone all Dixie Chicks – she ain’t ready to make nice. Hailey goes out the door. OK, Roy couldn’t say the right thing if he was given a script. Remember last week,

 

Hailey, “Wish me luck, Roy.”

Roy, “You’ll be in my thoughts.”

 

 

Later, after Becky has closed the café Roy sees in very real terms where his stubbornness has left him. The takings in the café are low and the wife is nowhere to be found. Becky picks up the ball Roy has dropped and decides to go looking for Hailey who, has been sitting at the Kebab shop. My god, she was miles away. Hailey and Becky chat and later we see Roy talking to Becky on the phone. Hailey is stopping with her for the night.

 

 

So guess who blew back into town? That’s right Cilla Battersby Browne is back and she’s bronzed, brash, brassy,  busty and ballsy. She also seems to be brassic and broke. Or is she? While she couldn’t pay for her cab she does produce a GENUINE designer bag for Fiz’s birthday. I guess the old guy is good for something. The really beautiful part of the storyline is Cilla telling everyone that the American’s loved her. They loved her accent, her style and her cooking. So … Cilla had to cross the pond to find people with less class than her. (I could actually hear Michigander Fan and Corrie USA saying “HEY!” while shaking their fists at the TV).

 

Anyway, while John and Fizz are talking to Cilla, Sally Webster decides that she needs more guidance on her essay. Help yourself, Sally. You’re in a pub. John politely points out that Cilla has just gotten back from the US and they are having a bit of a catch-up.

 

Totally oblivious, Sally seems to think that John doesn’t want to talk to her because of Kevin.

 

Now, on to one of the most exciting parts of the show for me. Violet and Jamie get dressed to go to Jamie’s no-longer-drunk mom’s wedding. Violet wears an inexplicable silvery blazer. * Jamie looks handsome in his suite. They go to the wedding and come home and they are acting very much like a couple.

 

I really identify with Violet as a character. Except, I am not pregnant with a gay man’s baby. I am generally much more up beat than she is and I don’t nearly have her good luck with blokes, so yeah, we’re exactly alike.

 

I love Jamie and Violet together. I think they make a smashing pair.

 

*You know, I am really unsure exactly what this was. I think it was a shimery silver blazer, but my eyes were almost burned out of their sockets when I saw her that she could have been wearing anything. Are the writers using wardrobe to try and suggest that Violet is beginning to suffer from some sort of mental illness.

 

In Other News

 

Sean goes on date, debates the merits of Shirley Bassey, wakes Violet – at 11:00 PM.

Rosie is clearly trying to impress Carla.

Paul is tormenting Tyrone.

 

Friday June 21st 2008 - Oops, we forgot the Update Update

Hailey’s Other Son, Jerome

The show opens with Hailey at the lake with her son. He’s about to learn that yes his life is indeed the stuff that soap operas are made of. At this point it looks to Christian that Hailey is covering for her scoundel of a brother. If only it were that easy. Hailey tells Christian that Harold was a very troubled person. She tells him that Harold was unhappy and never felt right. Then she lets the bomb drop and tells him that she was born Harold but always knew that she was a Hailey and that she is Christian’s father.

You can’t blame the boy for being shocked.* But, it gets a little ugly. As Hailey is begging for some understanding, Christian hits her with the back of his hand. He hits her pretty hard and she falls to the ground bleeding all over her sweater. He’s shocked but when Hailey reaches her hand out for help, he turns his back on her.

Later we see Hailey cleaning herself up. This is the low point. She goes home and while walking along the cobbles Lloyd spots her from his cab and stops to show concern. At home she and Roy have it out and it is clear that he just doesn’t get it.

*Boy or man? How old is this dude? He dresses and styls his hair like a 19 year-old but has more wrinkles than Deirdre’s neck.

It’s Fiz Bomb Brown’s birthday and what are her big plans? She get’s to go see Henry V with her boyfriend and Sally Webster. On the up-side Kevin will be there. Fiz complains about this to Kelly and Vicki. Vicki educates her on the finer points of Polish theatre. Our pharmacist has suprisingly low brow tastes.

They all head into the pub and try to figure out if there will be any sex in he play. But, it looks grim.

Over at the Webster’s Sally and Kevin are getting ready to go to the play. Sally is under the impression that the place will be filled with Manchester’s jet set. She is behaving like an idiot over what she is gointg to wear. The woman has lost her mind, and I kind of love it.

Meanwhile she and Rosi are having a conflit over Rosie’s non-existant skirt. Sally calls it a “pelmet.” Sophie demands to know what a “pelmet” is. I could tell her, I went to Catholic school. In any case I am only 95% sure of what a “pelmet” is. But, let’s see if the Corrie Canuckster’s can guess. Hint, it doesn’t mean “really short skirt.”

After the play, Sally, Kevin, Fiz and John head to the Rovers. The reviews are mixed. But, Sally seems unimpressed by the calibre of the audience. That woman in the Disney jumper would NOT stop talking. That didn’t stop Kevin from enjoying the play or from making the apt parallel between Henry V and Tony Soprano. Sally thinks Kevin is being thick even when John agrees with him.

In Other News

 

Rosie kind of asks Liam out. It doesn’t go over well but makes me laugh.

They are trying to set up sexual tension between Liam and Carla in the form of Carla insulting Maria and Liam taking exception to that bloke Tony. It isn’t working for me.

Meanwhile, Carla is getting the signals for that Tony bloke

Becky plans to drink her face off and eats a big sandwich to create a base for the booze.

Sarah will never forgive David. This makes Gail sad.